


The Large Bladder of the Law

by redglares_hot_butt



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Gen, Pee, Watersports
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-22
Updated: 2013-04-22
Packaged: 2017-12-09 04:08:56
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,117
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/769819
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/redglares_hot_butt/pseuds/redglares_hot_butt
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Redglare is investigating a crime scene, and preparing to lay a trap for when the bad guys return. She has only a couple of problems: the criminals left a message in the dirt on the floor that she wants to erase, and she has to piss but the bathroom isn't functional. But she soon realizes that she can deal with both things at once...</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Large Bladder of the Law

Redglare paced around, glancing in the kitchen drawers for anything suspicious. Her group of legislacerators had just taken down part of a large smuggling operation. The smugglers had been using abandoned hives from young trolls as their meeting places and drop points. It had been hard to catch up to them, but Redglare and her colleagues had finally found which hive was their next target. They arrived after the smugglers had done their initial preparations but before the delivery occurred.

Sure enough, some trolls had shown up to drop off their contraband, and were captured by the legislacerators without any fuss. Redglare's colleagues had gone off with the criminals and the stuff. She had stayed behind to search for any more clues, and to install surveillance equipment so that they could tell if anyone else was coming.

So Redglare had carefully searched the hive and prepared everything, and was now just double-checking a few more places that things could be hidden. It had been a long night, but there were just a two more things to do now. She had to activate all of the surveillance equipment, and she had to erase a message left by the first set of smugglers to prepare the hive.

A sudden pang of pressure from Redglare's bladder caused her to squirm a bit and press her legs together. Okay, maybe she had three things to do. She'd been quite busy with her work and so far had neglected to relieve her growing need to urinate. She'd certainly have to stop by the bathroom in the hive before her dragon flew her back to headquarters.

Redglare walked over to the living room of the hive. It had a linoleum floor, which had gotten quite dirty in the time that the hive had been abandoned. The criminals had left a message scrawled in the grime on corner of the floor. It warned the other smugglers that the legislacerators were on their tail, and had a bit too much other information for comfort. Redglare and her colleagues weren't sure how the smugglers had found that out, but they had decided they wanted to get rid of the message to make sure no one else could see it. 

It should have been easy enough to erase - there were mops and soap conveniently left in a closer nearby. But the plumbing had been disconnected in the building, so there was no way to get any water for cleaning. So Redglare had put off doing this until now, thinking that she'd figure something out eventually. The disconnected plumbing was also why she hadn't relieved herself when she was searching the bathroom earlier, for that matter - at the time she didn't have to go too badly, and didn't feel like pissing in a toilet that couldn't flush. 

Redglare dumped some soap on the ground and rubbed the mop over the message scrawled in the grime. It didn't really do much - she really needed to find some water. Of course, with the plumbing out that wasn't as easy as it sounded. Redglare mentally went over her search through the house to think if she'd come across anything that would suffice. Maybe there had been some stuff in the kitchen? Her thoughts were cut off, though, from another pang of pressure in her bladder. _Oh_. She had the sudden realization that she could deal with a couple of her problems at once.

A grin spread across Redglare's face, even as she instinctively doubled over a little and grabbed her crotch until the pressure from her bladder subsided a bit. When it did, she stood up straight again and quickly undid her belt and fly and pulled her pants and underwear down to her knees. She cackled a bit to herself as she adjusted her clothing, amused by the idea of using her urine to erase the smuggler's message.

Redglare waddled so that she was standing over the offending message, with her butt facing towards the corner. She pulled her robes to the side with one hand and braced herself against the wall with the other. She then settled into a fairly high squat, pushing her knees out just far enough forward to make sure that she wouldn't accidentally piss on her pants. Redglare then leaned forward a bit and relaxed her muscles to answer the urges from her bladder.

A stream of urine poured out from Redglare's body, and she sighed and shuddered from the feeling of relief. She closed her eyes and savored the sensation for a moment as her stream reached full force, but then bent over a bit more to look at what she was doing. She could see her teal stream spraying out on a backwards arc, hitting the wall near the baseboard before dripping down onto the very corner of the floor.

Well, she would be able to just push her puddle around with the mop, but Redglare decided to have some fun. She straightened up her back a bit more, and her stream moved down to hit the ground. It flowed out to form a new puddle, and the soap on the ground started to bubble up as her urine splashed down on it. With a grin, Redglare shook her butt back and forth to spread her pee across more of the accumulated dirt and soap.

Redglare kept pissing for a while longer, waving her butt around and inching forward to cover new ground. By the time the last bit dribbled out of her bladder and onto the floor below her, there was a sizable puddle of teal pee on the ground, covering the entire area that needed to be cleaned up. After standing up straight and pulling up her pants, Redglare turned to admire her handiwork as she adjusted her underwear and zipped up. Her urine had caused the soap to bubble up into teal suds that were now covering most of the grime. She could see that her stream had even been strong enough to dislodge some of the dirt. 

With a grin and a cackle, Redglare grabbed the mop again and ran it across the puddle. Most of the dirt and grime came up in one swoop. She mopped back and forth a few times, erasing the rest of the grime and the message that had been written in it. The floor in the corner came out looking fairly clean, at least compared to the rest of the room - Redglare giggled for a moment at the thought that she'd accomplished this by using it as a makeshift bathroom. She then returned the urine-soaked mop to the closet, and headed for the door with her bladder empty and her job almost done.


End file.
